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Young love is a flame;very pretty,often very hot and fierce,but still only light and flickering. -Henry Ward Beecher
When young people who are barely out of their teens fall in love adults tend to trivialize their so-called relationships by being judgemental and often uncaring. While they are parents who are supportive and open in this area,this article would be touch on the effects on trivializing the experience of a first love that transpires during developmental years.
This subject has been a hot on my mind lately as I too,have been a young teen back in the day,with the only exception being technology wasn?t that evolved that I could have been way more wildly influenced by it than say,the traditional media and peer pressure.
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Kids today are like miniature adults as their minds take in all of the info about love relationships cued from their favorite celebrities that are as young (or even younger) as them as blue prints they use to begin emulate and keep up in ways they approach their life. Let?s also face the fact that our contemporary urban young teens and tweens are falling in love or having crushes at a rate that is relatively higher than back in the olden golden days of their parent?s generations.
Young love relationships are indeed challenging as teenagers are still finding for that stable sense of identity within themselves. They may seem to know everything there is to know about ?love?intellectually based on their best friends?relationships,films and the music scene but if that?s the only source of advice,we?re doomed. However,it is through direct experience that our teens learn more realistically about falling in love and being in a relationship with another person. This unfortunately entails cuts and bruises to the heart and mind.
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Being that the teen phase is marked by hormonal ups and downs,it?s only natural that young love is an intense experience that can threaten to throw the course of a teen life if he or she is not taught to approach it in a balanced attitude.
Love can rock your world no matter what your age is but when it happens at a young age,it can easily turn into a giant rollercoaster ride where senses and reasons can seem to elude a young person particularly when love becomes an all-encompassing obsession.
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This is where parents and guardians play an extremely vital role. Instread of viewing your young child?s latest love interest with her/his classmate with a major consternation and an impulsive need to say??you?re too young,this will never last?,learn to be there in a non judgemental way if you ever want to keep a line of communication open with your teen.
It will be a big difference as you can play an active role without appearing to be inserting yourself as a know-it-all-authority that seems to be unpopular among the young crowd. You can act as an anchor to your child?s life,reminding him/her to develop self confidence and a strong identity that is also independent from the relationship,so that if it spirals down,your child still has a ?life?for which he/she can safely go back to.
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Being there by your teen?s side when she/he gets to experience the first love of their lives strengthens the parent-child relationship unlike any other.
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While the majority of parents do no advocate love relationships to start young in a backdrop of a country such as Malaysia,the more we pretend that it is not happening,the more we delude ourselves so much so at the expense of developing a nurturing and deeper understanding connection with our children.
Let?s start reminding ourselves that we were teenagers once and we too have had intense crushes and fallen in love even when age and our own parents dictates that we OUGHT not to.
This time,let us be by our children side and be the lantern that light the way.
| Credit:Amanda on Flickr
Let young love set an opportunity for our teens and tweens to learn more about themselves and the power of a relationship when approached with the right mind-set.
Here on Pieces of Reverie,our one and very own Miss Reverie shares her very best about matters of love,life and relationships. You may read more of her at REVERIE SANCTUARY.
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